Drunk The Halls


I am married to the craftiest man on earth. He can prepare anything in the kitchen, decorate as if his life depended on it, coordinate classically (even covered in tattoos, I might add), walk in 6 inch acrylic heels (I cannot) and paint a face like nobody’s business. There’s really not much he can’t do, so when he mentioned an idea he saw for holiday wreaths using wine corks I knew I was in for a special treat. Tacky? Yes. Ingenious? Absolutely. Luckily for him I drink wine on a daily basis so there’s no shortage of corks here! Next I hope he builds a greenhouse for me in the backyard with all the bottles I’ve emptied enjoyed–or at least a pretty little scaled down Taj Mahal that extends from our backyard in LA County to the bottom tip of the Baja Peninsula.

All you need are:
a wino husband
lots of corks (he used 151)
a gluegun
wreath frame, found in craft stores

Put on some Jimmy Smith or Vince Guaraldi, skewer corks with toothpicks and dab the end with glue and insert into wreath frame. Stand back, admire, and realize that you are now out of corks and must immediately replenish your supply.



  1. says

    I am dying to make on of those! I saw one in a magazine and thought — I drink enough wine to make that!” I am running to get the base wreath right now 😉

    I think it is absolutely lovely.

  2. says

    Ahhh that is so cool!!! Hahahahaha. My boyfriend would think me crazy if I attempted that. I’m just not crafty enough to attempt anything, even if it is simple or sounds simple. Sigh- I’d end up gluing the dog to my table or something :(

  3. says

    haha!!! i loved this post, matt! this was hilarious the whole way through! your writing is always something i look forward to – it always guarantees a laugh. you’re so witty…

    and adam is a crafty little biscuit, isn’t he??? great wreath – i LOVE that it’s made out of corks!

    i don’t think mine would look as good… made out of milky way wrappers.

  4. says

    bloody effing BRILLIANT!!!!!!
    I can’t wait to show my mom so she can finally do something with the thousands (literally) of corks she has saved in trash bags in her cellar!
    you guys RULE!

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