The Los Angeles Times calls it a welcomed jolt for the frozen yogurt chain. Fortune magazine calls it a big boost. However you look at it, the $27.5 million that was just infused into the Pinkberry Chain by Howard Schultz’s venture capital firm is bound to cause overexposure and give me an even larger frozen yogurt headache.
I like Frozen Yogurt. I really do. But living in LA (or NYC, for that matter) has taken a bit of the luster off of an otherwise shiny scoop. You can’t go anywhere without seeing new frozen yogurt shops opening up, and today’s news is no doubt going to make that green tea scoop with various toppings as ubiquitous as the green siren’s lattes and venti coffees.
But hey, If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.
Having said that, I’m thinking we shouldn’t rest until a million yogurt shop knock offs litter every strip mall, gas station, and co-branded KFC/Taco Bell from here to Orlando. And in an effort to make it just a wee bit easier for you out there, I’m throwing my marketing brain into to the mix.
Ladies and gentleman, I give you the Mattbites 3-Point Froyo Chain Name Selector®.
Use as you’d like, you can thank me later.
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Matt, you are TOO DAMN FUNNY! I am dying over here! Tears of hilarity… Stop it already! No, don’t stop! Wait…
Mine’s called “Beri-Beri Nenah Cherry”
Pink-Sack!
How about tangy-sack with the golden cherry icon. A great service to the frozen yogurt shop with nonsensical name potential owners. Seriously it’s so over the top in LA I’m sick of it and I barely ever eat frozen yogurt, besides didn’t we all already do this in the 80′s.
I don’t know about the whole frozen yoghurt chain thing being in NZ and all, but your discouraged combinations are hilarious!
‘yo-lick’ is the highlight of my evening. thank you!
better yo-lick, than Fro-lick…
pink, crimson or mauve nugget, not so good, fast nugget that’s just wrong… But Happy Spoon sounds a little too off mark, and all too likely…
Very funny.
cream-swallow w/ a golden cherry please
LOL that’s really funny and creative of you! I could see some really naughty combinations out of the chart…and Neneh Cherry (!!!), now that’s brilliant! Hahahah.
I love it! I just read we are getting a Kiwiberri here in Vegas. I have yet to have any of these modern frozen yogurt chains- I’m more of a gelato girl. But anyway… my name picks would be:
Deep Swallow or Cream Nuggett-
naughty, naughty
Who wouldn’t want tangy sack?
Ew.
GREAT post; it’s definitely post-on-the-fridge-worthy.
That was great! I love to start the day laughing!
I remember the first wave of frozen yogurt chains when I was a kid (California). I loved it, mainly because of the topping selections like broken up candy bars and gummy bears. At some point frozen yogurt seemed to fall out of favor only to be replaced by the expensive “cold marble slab stone” ice cream places that started popping up everywhere. Again, I liked them because of the toppings (or mix-ins) and the ice cream wasn’t half bad either.
But I’ve always missed the frozen yogurt places of my youth. They were good, inexpensive, and a bit healthier than ice cream. Since I’ve been overseas for quite a few years now I missed out on the frozen yogurt revival so I couldn’t wait to try Pinkberry when I was in NYC last summer.
I stood in line forever before paying a whole lotta money for the most disappointing cup of frozen yogurt I’ve ever had. Oh well. I won’t be rushing out to try any of the others.
Unless, of course, it’s called “Sweet Nugget.”
matt…. you are so effing brilliant!
creamnugget is possibly the greatest name ever for a froyo stand. You sir, are a genius.
Seriously, this yogurt thing is out of control. Everywhere I go, people are eating pinkberry or talking about eating pinkberry or running straight into me (literally) in their all-fired hurry to get into pinkberry.
Am I crazy, or couldn’t you just visit the sad, lonely pinkberry of my youth, Penguin’s, and skip the lines?
Being an Arizonan, I’m new to the whole “yogurt wars” saga. As far as I was concerned, TCBY was still the only yogurt joint around.
I did a little reading and found http://www.redmangousa.com/
and an interesting comparison.
http://la.eater.com/archives/2007/03/13/the_yogurt_wars_part_ii_red_mango_vs_pinkberry_a_study_in_pictures.php
What ever happened to being original…
Yo-Swallow
And my icon isn’t listed there because it’s so totally nsfw.
Hahaha. I am literally laughing out loud! I love it! How long did it take you to make this graphic because it is genius and so are you! Just for kicks, I think my froyo shop would be called happy swallow and I’m definitely using the golden cherry. Haha!
Seriously?? That is flat out brilliant.
Thanks for the highlight of my day!
“fro-sack”? Priceless.
Nobody take this the wrong way, but it sounds like a hairdo for testicles.
and here i thought when the TCBY left my hometown in 1989, it was all over. how wrong was i?!
and here i thought when the TCBY left my hometown in 1989, it was all over. how wrong was i?!
Oh the potential in some of those name combos, Matt.
Yo-Sack, anyone?
Froghurt is seriously thin on the ground in the UK, which sucks.
Tangy (Nene Cherry icon) Scoop. lol that was fun.